Ι am aware I haven’t wrote anything in a while and it has been bothering me, because in totally honesty, I really enjoy writing this blog. every since I have written stuff down from around 14 years old, it is very much therapy for me. And those that know me know I very much need as much therapy as I can get! which does sound funny but is also very much true! I am just always hopeful that its fun crazy more than any other type of crazy. Ill pause now as any friend reading this politely nods….
by the way I’ve had a blog in my drafts folder for a while now, where I have wrote about that very subject, and for various reasons I have never been able to press the publish button, mainly because it needs work and I don’t feel its the right time to dedicate my time telling my story on that.Maybe its the feeling of if I go ill go all the way kind of feeling. But one day I definitely will, especially with the importance of talking about mental health being reminded with Stephen fry admitting his struggles recently. It will always be important to talk about it because my immediate reaction to Stephens admission is that I hope one day mental health wont be debated, but understood. And if i can help that happen by even one person knowing my side of that then it will be worth doing, just like my mam talking about her parkinson illness, the more people that know the better everyone can understand the condition. but like i say, one day ill talk about it fully from my point of view,
but the truth is in regards to my blog inactivity, is that I have been ridiculously busy after uk expo. not only did I do two blogs during the weekend and then have to edit two podcasts, but Most of my recent time has been spent writing a web series. My basic and rather tragic failings after uni was I tried to get into the BBC as a producer and got very close to doing so. now one of the things they ask you to do is write a pilot, so I wrote a show called looking forward to failure! now ever since I wrote it, it has been on my old computer that i originally thought Id lost the data for . but, I came up with the genius solution (ok my cousin did, but he isn’t here to take the credit!) to buy the casing for a external hard drive so i could reuse my old hard drive. So through the wonder of magic commonly known as technology, hey presto! I could get my data of it and there it was, my old series pilot! So, after willing myself to think it wont suck balls, I decided to read it, and yeah it needed work ,but it got me feeling passionate about writing again. And some of it made me laugh which I very rarely do in regards to my own material. So I decided there and then to commit my spare time to write this and see if i could make it a web series!
its funny, I really don’t believe in coincidences or that the stars align and all the pieces fall right into place,(I’m a scorpio that ain’t gonna happen-joke) but I know things can influence me. coupled with the good fortune of finding the script I have been watching so many web series, that it made me realise that something like this can be possible if I put my mind to it. It’s really weird though, cos like I said right at the beginning of this blog I really struggle with having to be over confident in making something happen but with business and creative pursuits you kinda have to be. With a web series you kind have to have the mindset that it will be made then it will be successful in order to have the motivation to make it happen in the first place. Or at least I have to, which makes me sad because all i really want to do is to see it made but anyone that writes something that says that they don’t care if its not successful are simply not telling the truth.
Ultimately, I think if i don’t dedicate all my time to it ill slack of and then lose the desire to complete it ,and to be honest, I do that far too often that I might never complete any idea ever! so other than my regular schedule of podcasting and freelance work, I’m trying desperately to get the script ready by finishing the final episode of the first season so I can then try and get it to the next stage! then theres figure out the kickstarter project so if anyone says to me in the next few days, Steven you dont work hard, you may not see them again!
because the things that are worth working hard for, are the reason they are hard in the first place!
i did an interview where i talked about Geek apocalypse in detail! if your interested here it it is!